Sticker Shock

Yesterday I met up with a couple of my oldest friends for a trip to bargain hunters' paradise: Ikea. No matter how hard I try, I just cannot say no to a visit to the store with the unpronouncible names and the delicious Sweedish meatballs. I can (and do) spend hours mulling over the kvorts and blatskiis, tossing the cheap napkins and candles into my cart willy-nilly like a kid in a candy shop. Cheap shopping Disneyland at its best.

I was alarmed to find that when I reached the checkout and heaved all of my spoovrits and flaaskims onto the conveyer belt that my tab reached an unthinkable $167! I didn't have that much crap, how could that be?? With the pressure of loading all of the tiny goodies into the cart (Ikea has given up bags, great for the environment but I wish I'd gotten the memo), I did not have time to think about what I was buying that could be costing so much.

It wasn't until the next morning that I thought to check my receipt and figure out what the hell I'd just purchased (for myself no less, not much Christmas shopping happening at Ikea). It turns out that one of my impulse buys was a memory foam pillow (the Gosa Lilja) cost an outrageous $59.99. I become the queen of cheap when I shop at this store. Anything over $9.99 does not make it into my cart. Imagine my horror at finding out that I had made such a rookie bargain-shopper error. I thought that I had grabbed its cheap counterpart, but alas no, and back to Ikea I headed to sheepishly return such a ridiculous and unnecessary buy. 


Lesson learned: make sure the Sweedish names match up to the tiny price label before throwing things in your oversized cart. Or maybe the lesson is to pay attention at the register instead of fantasizing about the meatballs that lie ahead in your future, and all the fun you might have with your lifetime supply of paper napkins.

New Arrival

I don't think I'll ever get tired of having a baby in the house. This weekend we added a new addition to our family: our new kitty Pitten. Sofie has been asking for a kitten for months, and dutifully feeding our older cat for the past month to prove her readiness for her own four legged friend.

Our acquisition of Pitten was downright serendipitous. My cousin works at a vet office in New Jersey and just happened to get in this adorable creature the night before her mother was coming up to visit us. She quickly had her vaccinated, dewormed, and flea treated in time to ship her up north and make a little girl's dreams come true.

Sofie was over the moon. Although she will not pick Pitten up or get to close to her paws, she dutifully lies on her belly and studies her every move, feeds and waters her every day, and is proud to announce to the world that this is HER cat.

The rest of us feel pretty much the same way. It's funny how baby animals seem to bring out the best in people. Francisco has been shutting her out of our bedroom at night, groping desperately under the bed to try and pull her out so that she won't keep us up with her scratching and mewling. He can't resist smothering her with kisses as he delivers her back down to the living room. Nathan, a relatively indifferent kid when it comes to pets, can't get enough of the kitty playtime either. Nothing like a tiny little ball of fur to keep a family entertained for hours.

Eastern Puerto Rico: Two families adventure into paradise

I am sad to say that I had to return from Puerto Rico two days ago, leaving one of the best vacations I've had in a long time.We had eight glorious days in this tropical paradise, each trumping the previous with the array of new adventures. From white sand to rain forests, ferry boats to sail boats, we covered more ground (and sea) on this week-long excursion than I have in years.

Puerto Rico feels like a real place, not built for tourists or catering to others, but an island where people live, work, and enjoy life, all the while welcoming visitors to their homeland. From the moment we arrived in San Juan with my friend Liz and our four children, I knew that this was not a place that puts on a show for its tourists. No shiny strip of glittery hotels masking the underlying poverty, or crowded marketplace with people pulling you in all directions to oversell their cheap merchandise with a fake smile. All we could see from the windows of the rental car were real families going about their business, and plenty of people enjoying life.

We arrived in San Juan on a windy afternoon and headed to the San Juan Marriott Resort and Stellaris Casino. This hotel has over 500 rooms and is located right on the sandy surfers' dream, Condado beach. Our adjoining rooms opened onto spacious balconies overlooking the turquoise Atlantic dotted with happy surfers. The warm sea breeze was the perfect welcome to our week of tropical heaven.

The kids immediately wanted to dive into the two large kid-friendly swimming pools abutting the beach, and the moms took no time at all to hit up the bar. The Marriott boasts several restaurants and bars, making those delicious daiquiris always readily available. The kids took to the water slide, and later the waves while we sat back and enjoyed our new found paradise.

The Marriott was an easy jump to the city of Old San Juan. Transporting us back centuries with its architecture and cobble stones, Old San Juan is a must visit of anyone heading to Puerto Rico. We had lunch and ice cream at one of the many shops, and headed up to visit el Castillo San Felipe del Morro, one of the 16th century forts that lie on the perimeter of Old San Juan. It's a long hike up to the fort, but the windy ocean breeze made it tolerable despite the pulsing midday sun. My son Nathan (age 6) was particularly excited to get inside the fort and check it out, but when we arrived at the entrance I realized I had left my wallet in the car and did not have the mere $3 entrance fee (kids are free). Unable to convince myself to walk all the way to the car and back, we settled on checking out the outside of the fort, and flying kites on the huge lawn that abuts the property. After some successful kite flying and more ice cream, the kids cooled off in a nearby fountain, shedding their clothes and running through the geysers without a hint of hesitation.

Staying in San Juan our first night of arrival made our trip that much easier. We didn't have to worry about more traveling after our arrival and were able to immediately jump into our vacation. Getting from the airport to the Marriott was a snap, with the help of a GPS from home. If you do not own one of these handy devices it would be in your best interest to pick one up before a trip to Puerto Rico (or rent one from the rental car company). While driving on the island is not necessarily difficult, roads are not always clearly marked or easy to find. We found ourselves driving the wrong way down a one way street more than once, so check to make sure there are other cars pointing in your direction, yikes!

After breakfast at the Marriott (a simple pleasure that can be included in the cost of your room if you request) and a walk on the beach Wednesday morning we headed east on the small coastal road 187. Not far from San Juan is a beach community known as Los Pinones, famous for the roadside restaurants and shacks preparing typical Puerto Rican cuisine. We had lunch at Mi Casita, feasting on rice, beans, plantains, and local seafood, each of us scarfing down our meals with the hunger that only comes from being at the beach. Then on to our rental house in Luquillo, a small town located between San Juan and Fajardo.

Luquillo turned out to be the perfect choice for our vacation. Our rental house sat close to the beach, in a gated community of homes called Solimar, each modest home with it's own little patio. We spent most nights on the patio listening to the waves and the sound of the coquis chirping (tiny frogs native to the island).
Our days were then spent divided by trips to the local Balneario (public beach), a beautiful calm beach one minute down the road, eating pinchos (grilled meat shishkabobs) and drinking rum filled coconuts, and exploring the island in all sorts of other adventures.

On Friday we journeyed to El Yunque, the only rain forest found in the US National Forest System. With vines curling around the trees and lush hibiscus dipping down to meet the earth El Yunque makes you feel as though you have stepped straight into the amazon. On each stop up the winding road the forest becomes more dense and the view from each peak more astounding. We hiked down to La Mina waterfall, about 3/4 of a mile each way, and enjoyed a dip in the cold mountain river under the falls. Nathan was the first one to clamber over the slippery rocks and make his way into the water, quite the pack leader on this trip! Sofie (age 3) on the other hand would have nothing to do with the water fall and spent the duration of our time sitting on the stone steps looking anxious and forlorn. We easily could have spent another day in El Yunque, but for the loud whining of the children as we hiked back up to our car, we did not return, and headed to the beach instead. School aged children would love this marvelous natural phenomenon, leave the whiners at home.

The best day for all of us was our Sunday trip to the deserted island of Icacos with East Island Excursions. This company runs several different boat trips with various adventures such as snorkeling or visiting one of the bio- luminescent bays. Our trip was a daytime snorkeling trip aboard a sailing catamaran called East Wind.

We boarded the ship around 9:30am , and immediately the rum punch was flowing. Our host was Owen Wilson's doppelganger, crew member Levi. With four years of experience sailing with East Island, Levi took no time to gain the passengers' trust, it was obvious by his friendly personality and relaxed manner that he loves his job, and wants everyone to have a good time. Food and drink was included in this adventure, and I could feel my limbs becoming loose before the boat set out into crystal clear open water.

We anchored at Icacos for almost 2 hours and were able to comb the beach, snorkel, and fly off the water slide into the ocean. Ultimate kid and adult heaven. Perfect white sand, clear water for snorkeling, and few enough of us to never feel crowded. The crew was comprised of helpful strapping men who suited us up and taught us the pointers of seeing the best sights, all the while staying calm, friendly, and attentive to the 77 passengers on the boat.

Our second stop was  snorkeling stop at turtle cay, a site known for sea turtles. We were not so lucky this stop, and on my one attempt to snorkel I found it difficult to make it out to see much, perhaps it was the combination of the current and the daiquiris. Liz and her son Andrew had better luck and explored the reef easily. Even without the snorkeling, lying out on the deck taking in the surroundings was far more pleasing than anything I could have imagined. My only complaint was that our five hour day was not long enough, I could have stayed a week. When we docked back in Fajardo the kids and adults agreed that our adventure with East Island Excursions was unbeatable, a perfect day for the whole family. At just $69 for adults and $49 for kids, the price is undeniably worth the experience.

Monday night we decided to hit up one of PR's biggest attractions, the bioluminescent bay. There are five bio bays in the world, and three of them are found in Puerto Rico. These lagoons are filled with millions of organisms called dinoflagellates that light up in the dark when disturbed. Hundreds of kayakers paddle out each night to experience this phenomenon. We decided that kayaking might be too hazardous with our kids (plus you have to be over seven to go), so we booked a spot on one of the only two electric boats in Fajardo's biobay. Our boat trip with Baby Bay Cruising Lagoon Company was scheduled to leave at 6:30, but due to some unfortunate planning on behalf of Captain Suarez, Baby Bay's leading man for the past 20 years, our boat was grounded in the sand at low tide and took over an hour to be pulled out. The benefit to this unforeseen delay was that when we entered the lagoon the 150 kayaks were leaving, and we had the place to ourselves. Upon entering the lagoon we passed through over a mile of mangroves, a dark cave-like entrance out of another world. Birds called to us, iguanas napped in the trees, bats swooped by, and our guide Jennifer pointed out the reeds that hold embryos for sea horses who will eventually hatch and swim out to sea.

In the lagoon the kids could not get over the sight of their hands lighting up the water, or the fish darting back and forth with glowing tails. Nathan reported that this was the best experience of his life, and that made it worth the money for me. A ride in the electric boat will set you back about $45 for adults, $35 for kids, and can seat 6 people total. Given the number of kayaks who smashed head first into our boat on our way out to the lagoon, I would say that unless you are a skilled kayaker it is better to book in advance and go for the boat.

Our final full day in PR was a trip to the island of Culebra. Sometimes known as the "Spanish Virgin Islands", Culebra and it's larger sister island Vieques are vacation destinations unto themselves, but can also be great for a day trip when visiting the mainland. We booked the ferry a few days in advance, and found it almost impossible to visit on the weekend, but Tuesday was no problem. The ride cost just a few dollars per person round trip, and took about 1 1/2 hours each way. We left at 9 am and were on the reputably beautiful Flamenco beach by 11, with the assistance of a tiny Puerto Rican taxi driver ($30 round trip). The ferry ride to Culebra was choppy, even in the seemingly still waters, so beware of sea sickness if you are prone to it.

Once arriving at the beach, the sand was pure white and the waters crystal blue, it was a beautiful location to end our visit to Puerto Rico. We rented snorkeling gear, and Liz headed out on her own to explore the reef that lies directly on Flamenco Beach. While admiring purple jellyfish and barracudas she was swept out a little too far and got caught up in a rip current. Thankfully a man nearby heard her cry for help and pulled my dear friend to safety, as I smiled at her from the shore, thinking her waving was in merriment at the beautiful surroundings. Dear God. Warning: when snorkeling, especially after drinking pina coladas, it is best to wear a flotation device and use the buddy system.

Despite the near drowning, we all had a great week. All in all, Puerto Rico is the perfect setting for families who want to give their children more than the average tourist-trap vacation. My kids learned more in this week than in all of our previous trips combined, and I had no qualms about taking them out of school to show them the natural beauty that Puerto Rico has to offer. If you want to experience real life adventure (with no passport requried), take your family to eastern PR, you won't be disappointed.

Gender Balanced

Once again I am ever the negligent blogger, thinking about possible blog posts at random times of the day but never bringing them to life. Perhaps because my computer is on the fritz, or maybe because of the chaotic day to day of the working mom. Whatever, it's just not happening.

Sofie started dance class this week at a studio in Greenfield. This has to be the single most adorable thing in the entire world, right up there with kittens in a basket. So. Freaking. Cute. They had tap class and ballet/acrobatics time, and she loved every minute of it. While some of the new girls clung to their mothers' legs and refused to set foot on the dance floor, Sofie marched out with a confident smile in her new dance tights and shiny black tap shoes. She shuffled and hopped to the best of her three year old ability and when it was over she pirouetted all the way home, overtly proud of her new skills.

Mothering a girl is so unbelievably different from my boy-child experience. While Nathan drained every ounce of energy I had at this age as he sprinted through life at full speed, Sofie takes her time and adds a pirouette. Nathan was fast and furious, charging headlong into which ever rough and tumble activity (even if it was supposed to be a quiet story hour, which we tried to avoid at all costs). Sofie makes me slow down and spend time just snuggling up, content to be home with me all day.

I wouldn't trade either of these children for the world, and I appreciate their uniqueness tremendously. I have learned the art of toddler defense with Nathan, standing guard like a soccer goalie to keep him from being hit by a car or whacking another kid with a bat. I have also learned how to parent a very independent child, he marches into almost anything without fear, and he's game to try new adventures, much like me. We are partners in adventure, both of us loving to experience life to the fullest. We are reading Harry Potter now, almost done with the third book. Neither of us ever wants to put it down, we can't get enough quiet moments to devour our book together.

Sofie gives me my daily dose of sweetness. I can relate to her in ways that I have never related to anyone, except maybe my own mother. I understand how her heart and mind work and I love every minute of watching her childhood unfold, it's like reliving my own. I never thought it could be so different to raise two children, but the difference is extraordinary, and the challenge keeps me balanced. When I slow down to pay attention I am aware that I am blessed.

Nurses On STRIKE!

I have been a nurse for eight years. I have held several different nursing jobs during my short career, but for the past five years have been extremely happy on the labor and delivery unit of our local community hospital. The Birthplace at Baystate Franklin Medical Center has come to feel like home, my coworkers a family. We support each other daily through our work with women and infants, and in our personal lives.

At the Birthplace we care for women in one of the most vulnerable and simultaneously empowering times of their lives. We hold their hands in the middle of the night while they breathe through yet another grueling contraction, clean up the various body fluids cast in all directions that is part of bringing life into the world, listen to the pain, tears, joy, laughter, and fear that can accompany birth.

We stand guard over them, quietly watching for warning signs, occasionally rushing back to the operating room to assist in cesarean births if all is not right. We help the youngest humans into this world, breathing for them when they are unable to do so, performing chest compressions, starting IVs when babies are sick, administering medications in specific doses to ensure the best outcome, leaving no detail unnoticed.

When the unthinkable happens, and a family experiences the loss of a child, we hold our patients, we cry with them, we mourn with them, we treat them with the dignity and respect they deserve. We go out of our way to give each patient the kind of care that we would hope to receive. My work is my calling, I absolutely LOVE what I do.

Baystate Health has decided that they no longer wish to pay the nurses of Franklin Medical overtime for those of us working longer than our scheduled shift. That means when I am asked to stay late after working a 12 hour night shift, I would not be compensated at time and one-half, the way other nurses around the state are, as I am only scheduled to work 24 hours per week. Only when nurses reach 40 hours in one week they would be paid overtime. Out of the 209 union nurses only nine nurses work 40 scheduled hours per week.

By accepting this change to our contract we would be opening the doors to allow Baystate to fills holes in the schedules with nurses working long grueling hours, instead of having to hire more nurses to fill the positions so that we are appropriately staffed. Eliminating daily overtime for nurses is not only insulting to our profession, it is downright dangerous.

Baystate also has instigated a policy that allows nurses to accrue sick time, but punishes us for using it when we or our loved ones are sick. I know far too many nurses who are coming to work sick for fear of losing their jobs.

The unfortunate thing about this very public contract negotiation is that the Baystate Corporation is the only one with enough money and resources to make their voice heard. Most nurses can't afford to spend $7000 to place an add on the back page of the recorder to make our side known. We rely on the kindness and compassion of others to help us tell our story and spread the word.

The negotiations have also raised tension in the hospital, with contention between union and non-union employees. Most people who have not attended the negotiation sessions do not know the whole story. We have been accused of being "greedy" and "not caring" about our patients, both of which could not be farther from the truth. We are not giving up our overtime because we do not want to work overtime. We want to be safe for our patients and go home when our shifts are over. This should not be too much to ask.

So the time has come. Baystate Franklin Medical Center's nurses are going on strike for 24 hours starting this Friday at 7am. We need to let the hospital and their union-busting lawyer know that we will NOT tolerate their proposals. We want dignity and respect just like the patients we are trying to serve.

Angela 12/30/79 - 8/16/08

I am thinking about my good friend Angela Silva Wollman today. She was born in Brazil and came to Miami as a teenager. We met in Miami when we were 19, working together at a restaurant, and became fast friends. We were inseparable for most of my time in Miami, spending countless weekend nights out dancing Salsa (she was an excellent dancer and loved a party more than anyone I knew). I would stay at her apartment on Miami Beach and she'd make grilled cheese for breakfast and cafe con leche. No one made breakfast taste so good. 

Angela spoke 3 languages fluently, she worked 18 hour days at whatever job she had to try to push ahead. At 20 she married Michael Wollman, and gave birth to her baby girl Victoria at 22. She loved her daughter more than life itself, although she was not wild about being a stay at home mom. She always dreamed of having a career that she could be proud of, and after Victoria was in preschool she studied to become a massage therapist and went to work. I have never met a harder working woman. 

Angela gave everything she had to her friends and family. When I needed something she was always there for me, always an unconditional friend. She and her sister, Renata, were an inseperable duo, a Brazilian force to be reckoned with, beyond best friends. 

Angela died on August 16, 2008 at the age of 28, after a battle with B-cell lymphoma. Her family feels her loss everyday, as do I. She will be forever remembered for her infectious laugh, beautiful smile, and warm heart. Angela, it is with tears that I remember you on the day you were taken too soon. I love you, you are forever in my heart. 

Overdue Posting from a Negligent Blogger

No, I didn't say negligee, so don't get all excited (or horrified), I am a negligent blogger who, until about two minutes ago, forgot I even had a blog at all. My dad would be so disappointed in me.

Recently I feel like I can't keep up with the chaos of everyday life. Summer has been pretty easy for us, sleeping in, no rules to speak of, too much TV and junk food. But now the reality is setting in. I have become fat and lazy and my kids are like junkies hooked to the screen. It all sounds nice and relaxing but what we really end up with is a bunch of over-carbed, cracked-out, screaming monsters, yelling at each other all day and trashing the house as though someone was paying us to. Not good people, not good.

So Nathan realized first that he needed to get out of this hideous cycle, or maybe I realized it when the simple act of brushing his teeth became an epic battle. After cutting off all screen time priveledges he became so morose he wanted to get the hell out of dodge. So he asked me to sign him up for camp, and then he asked to stay at camp all day, and then to return the next week. Who the hell would turn down this opportunity? Seven hours of basketball and swimming to get us through the last dog days of summer. Yeah, we're going.

Sofie's summer stint did not work out quite so well. She begged me to let her go to gymnastics camp, and would not stop crying until I sought out the director and signed her up. Fortunately she let me give her a trial day before shelling out more cash for another questionable venture. So yesterday we gave it a shot. Sof lasted about 25 minutes, when halfway into the stretches she looked up at me (where I quietly watched for the mezanine, anticipating this moment) and said "Mom! I don't like this, let's go home!" Maybe we'll try again next year.

For now we eagerly await the start of school in just a couple short weeks. Time for someone else to boss them around for a while. Probably will be good for all of us.